My fondest memory of a human talking dirty was a few years back. I wont mention any names because clearly feelings will be inevitably hurt and I'm sure I will be called a piece of shit assclown for it, so this individual will remain anonymous.
Like any open-minded sexual being, sprucing up the bedroom with a little lusty lingo is always fun, UNLESS you are awkward and second guess yourself.
Example: (sorry parents, it's an honest blog, you can X out at any time)
Direct Quote
*In a mumbled, heavy-panted voice* "I wanna eat your *BLEEP*"
Me: What?
Dipshit: I would like to go down on you.
(obviously that is NOT what you said at first there Wang Chung)
*In a mumbled, heavy-panted voice* "Yeah you like my *BLEEP*?"
Me: What?
Dipshit: Is this okay for you?
(hm, not what you said first)
*In a raspy, child predator voice* "God, I want to *BLEEP* you."
Me: What?
Dipshit: Would you like to have sex now?
Naturally you see that I am an asshole, and got a kick out of hearing how the unnecessarily heavy breathing man would twist his R-Rated statements into PG-13...Now the X rated jibber jabber is for another time. Poor guy. Eh, what can you expect from a guy who names his dick and balls. Not much my friends, not much.
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