Part III

In reality, I am only making the POF blog so that it gives me the boost to delete such rubbish...but before I do...I need to share the best of the bests.

Hello :) For the first part, Your profile is completely amazing! It is great how straight forward you are. Not for nothing, but im from new jersey and I was able to know you were a Jersey girl from the start. Well anyway's if you are intrested in chatting with me send me a message. Have a good day!---------no.

Hey how's it going, I was swimming by and your profile caught my eye, hope u don't mind me stopping to say hi If you wanna chat, swim by and say hi =] -------------does this work!??!?!...just drown dude. Grrr your so damn gorgeous ! --------*YOU'RE*...and did you growl? never okay. Their- used prior to a noun example their opinion there- "You own your own from there." " We had just arrived there." This is a tough one, and I understand why a lot of people have problems with it. Heck most people didn't attention in English from 9th to 12th grade. They're- contraction of they are. Some people find not using the contraction makes them seem smarter. I just think they're trying to hard. (See what I did there? :D) -----------this is bc my profile says I need the humans that write to me to know which fucking there, their, or they're they're using.    Hi there, I just made it all the way through your profile and have to say I nearly snorted water out of my nose when you described the last photo you received! Anyways, not sure if I am your type but take a look. I'm easy going, open minded, I do know what chucks are but don't currently own any. I'll straight up admit I have no fashion sense and tend to wear nothing fancy.... But I this works out you can fix that;) Hope to hear back from you, either way though you may want to reconsider telling people not to post pictures of herpes infected lips..... I mean isn't it much easier to rule them out if they post pictures for easy reference:) Have a great evening gorgeous, Brian -----------my profile says i love men who wear chucks and if u dont know what they are then you are probably an ass clown...it also says not to post pics of your mouth close up when you have a cold sore, bc you are fucking disgusting....sigh    I would swim up the Amazon with 45 pound dumbbells tied to my scrotum and Ellen Degeneres’ queef as my air supply if it meant I could eat a sea food dinner with you over skype on a dial up internet connection. But for real I just wanted to say I really like your hair.-------------------BAHAHHAHA yup   Hahaha!!! I was laughing the whole time I was reading you brutally honest description of guys who think they are gods gift to women... cant stand those type of people.. Women too!!! I can tell you're just like me in personality... I am a free spirit too!!! And when you said " Please know the difference between there, their, and they're"... I knew that's when we would get along, 'cause I hate when people can't even judge the difference between to, too, and two! But seriously, I do believe we have a lot in common. And just so you know... I LOVE YOUR SMILE!!!!-----------if only he knew i have a stigma against men who EXCLAIM too much...hmph  R u kidding me? Excuse me ,but you take my breaths away! --------------oh for realz? ya breaths? idiot. sounds like you get all walks of life flowing through your emails, so i know im probably not going to be different from the others, i'll still give it my best try and hopefully you'll write back, btw my pic in profile is kinda old and even though i look like that, im still different now in lots of ways. i work 40 hours a week go to school fulltime, or at least full time for me, im earning my dual bachelors in aerospace/mechanical engineering, i work out as much as humanly possible...i'll explain the workout later, i love to read ficiton as well as non fiction, i drive really fast, im very charming, handsom, im not saying im funny, but i love love love to laugh, i play xbox, and some other computer games, but most of the time im sudying, working, working out, hanging out with friends and trying to save up for my sky diving certifaction. btw im horrible speller,i try to use the best grammar, cause not good grammar lol is unattractive. i trully love conversation, about anything really. and besides all that just trying my best to thrive an not survive through life. i just got out of a 2 year relationship about a couple months ago, thats why im working out all the time, for time not nessicarily lost just spent somewhere else. im writing you because you seem very refreshing, as in you are beautiful, i wont skip around that obvious fact, an that what you have wrote although extreamly blunt, and i like that, what you have wrote is in essence you, not saying you are as simple as what you have put down, but just the "need to know" stuff and i really do like it. anyways my profile dosent say much about me to say the least lol but what i have wrote here will pretty much sum it up, thats why its so much. in light of everything, im looking for something that could blossom into special.......i think i'll copy and paste some of this into my profile lol..................................................................a middle eastern justin bieber...fml

Part II

HELLO THERE GORGEOUS..HOW ARE YOU ON THIS FINE DAY?? HOPE UR DOING WELL...MAY I JUST SAY THAT U ARE BEAUTIFUL AND I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW ALL ABOUT YOU..IF U ALLOW ME TO. SO U HAVE A PHENOMENAL DAY AND I LOOK FOWARD TO HEAR FROM YOU! TTY SOON* :)-----------------------I was fine until some douchebag emailed me in all caps...


 i cant believe guys say mean things i love your look its freaking amaaazing and your italian from jersey just like me ...you already know f#ck what anyone says keep doing you!!!-------------------------yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh buddy.


Hey my name is Russ how are you doing today?
so question how many tats do you have?-------------why? so you can filet them off of my body when you kill me? Nat uh.


So i managed to read your entire novel. All i can say is wow...you must be having a hard time finding someone who is a legitamate soul on this site due to the six side notes. Being a leo myself i completely feel and understand where your coming from. im sure you get it all the time, but i'm not like all the rest of the guys that come through your inbox. I really am here to meet someone that is TRUE as well. So figure...What do i have to loose by trying to talk too someone that may be on my level as far as realism and what they truly want? I really like the fact that you are as blunt as you are. I'm sure alot of people think you are absolutly crazy for saying all that you did, but i honestly think its quite attractive. i started reading and instantly became more interested with the more that i read about you. Even though in your novel you come off as somewhat of a tough one, i'm more than willing to bet that you are a super sweet, genuine, caring soul. im really intrested in talking with ya some. so check me out and lemme know what you think. hope to hear back from ya :) -----------this one wasn't terrible...mainly bc he caught on that im radical...however...not my type...but ladies. if this dude sounds nice to you i can play wing girl :)


 i swear there anit nothing more sexy then a woman who is soo gorgeous with such beautiful ink on her skin ..... you look amazing ------THERE ANIT NOTHING MORE SEXYYY ...SHOOOO EEEEE


 Im surely not your type as I do not meet many of your criteria, but that is not the
purpose of this message. I would like to congratulate you on a fantastic profile full of
fantastic facts and brutal attacks on the douchery that exists. You're humor precedes
you, and I read through completely just to make my day that much brighter.
I have no interest in trying to swoon you with catchy pictures, and how awesome I am
and blah blah blah, just felt it was necessary to point out that I don't think you should
stop what you are doing. Stay true to yourself, which you are, and don't fret, the good
guys are out there.
And for the record, being called a sexy b, isn't that bad, right? Or does that not stand
for brunette? haha. I wish you the best of luck and would enjoy the occasional
rebuttle/conversation. And like I said before, this is not my sinister way of hitting on
you, I know when I'm outmatched, besides it never hurts to make a great friend.
Phil-------------------------....jesus christmas


Layers
To give myself I show my trust
Protect my fragile heart I must
Layers are my guarding shield
For when I’m broke and forced to heal
Outermost is filled with ink
The memories in which I sink
Full of color, blacks and grays
Permanent and here to stay
Skin is rugged, tough and torn
From all the trials life has thrown
Peel one back to find anew
A part of me I’ve kept from you
Underneath is tissue filled
To wipe the tears that have been spilled
Intertwined, the muscle lies
The strongest part, when both combined
Countless hours, training hard
Defensive layers, standing guard
All together, running through
A blood supply that flowed for you
Opened up to let you in
Devastated, scarred within
Stitch me up and cut the cord
Start the healing, love restored.---------------a poem...yes...poetry....this was entitled "since you are a writer"....did he think id publish this?

Oh Plenty of Fish...Part I

Just figured I'd give you all a giggle with some of my REAL and copy/pasted emails from this dating site.

My profile is very blunt, sarcastic, and to the point...and this, is the result.

u r so sexy love it tats are nice -------------fail


im Dan . i like your profile and your pics..hows the site worken for ya...? -----------spelling? fail.


  You and me, drinks Friday night, as I am busy until then! ---------I guess i missed the part where I ever said Hello back...


  Hi,
Let me say first and foremost that you have one of the more interesting profiles I've read in a long long time. I must say you're really attracting winners on this thing huh? Well let me get to it I'm Mike and I'm 27 and live in the Waterford Lakes area. I'm in grad school at UCF and well what can I say these little sorority UCF girls ehhh not really my thing so I figured I'd check this out and haven't done much better on here. You want a big guy well you got it. I'm 6'3" 250lbs big football player type (well ex football player to be exact). You're tattoos are super sexy and well so are you. Kind of hard to make out what they are in the pix exactly but they look great. I'm almost done with my 3/4 sleeve it's been a process but I love it. I really like how you referred to people putting their own story on their bodies. It's refreshing to see another person who doesn't just get tattoos because they're cool or what other people think of them. All my tattoos mean something to mean and that's how it should be. Well to keep this as short as possible let me end here by saying you sound like an awesome girl and I'd love to get to know more about you. If you're interested let me know. I hope to hear from you soon hun.
---------I highlighted my fave parts....like the fact that he looks like one of the goombas from Mario Bros...or the fact that this is NOT short....fak


Let me proceed...


Wow, I can't believe you had to add five amendments! Sorry your faith in men had to be shaken so viciously. Do you encounter men like that in person? I'd like to believe the detachment from social manners is due mainly from interaction over the internet. On a side note, I'm curious as to what sparked your interest in getting tattoos? I've always been interested in them but only recently found something I could see bound to my body for life. Don't give up on the less fair sex yet! Beauty attracts bees before butterflies.-----------a big black man, and ya know what. ill probably make that last quote a fbook status or something...and in reference to me giving up...its bc on my profile it now says I am a lesbian...totally fine.

Your an very interesting character, all-in-one and one-in-all. Hahh. Surprisingly amazing. ^_^ --------and YOU'RE not a very good speller...ugh    I don't mean to startle you or anything..cause I'm fully aware that we are complete  strangers..but in all honesty, I must say that you are a very beautiful woman with a smile that  would brighten up a strangers (just like me lol) day with no problem..with that saying..If you  don't know by now, I find you very attractive..but that's only physically..because I don't know  you..but in order for me to get to know you..it would take actual interest from the  counterpart..which is you..what you say?----------------well, I am startled. next. Hey I must admit you have one of the most hilarious profiles I've read on POF. I was going to put my bid in but then I read side  note V, which basically threw out any chance I had to holler....HaHa. Just wanted to let you know I love your free will and sense  of humor, take care. --------------sincerely, the man who has "deuces" up in every fucking picture...god. I'm gonna try again because I think you seem really awesome. Anyhow I think we should talk sometime... I don't think you will be disappointed..If you are shame on me lol. I'm not necessarily talking about dating either, friends are cool too. We shall see.---------------we shall not. *You might be saying. wow nik. ease up...they might be genuine guys....trust me...im only posting the emails of the men who look like child predators and/or the one's with profiles that look as if a dyslexic 4 year old typed 'em.   MY name is craig im.22 from daytona and ibseen u on here and seen we had alot in common and was curious if u wanted to talk a lil more well if ur intrested write me bck p.s. I love ur tattooooss -----------------aw snap! HE SEEN ME!...dipshit Did u do anything amazing this weekend ---------------yeah, I met a real life human.  Hey, Hows it goen?---------------------------------------------------------------------....yup    Your profile is the best i've ever read. Just saying your personality is stellar! Of course with it being so in depth it makes it harder than usual to send the initial message. Online dating already is something I dont like very much, but figured in a new area why not try and meet people. So im going to just give it a go and say hello anyways. I'll let you read my profile and if you wish message me back and we can possibly take conversation from there. Yes i do apply to a few of your side notes but I liked what i read anyways. -----------predator  whats up nj nikki im chris i just moved toflorida fromboston a few weeks ago, im wicked sarcastic and outgoing, hit me up when u come on-----------------------a. FUCK the word wicked. b. FUCK the redsox. ever hear of a space bar? no? okay cool.

My thoughts on the gym.

I have found since recovering from my accident that the gym is not only insane positive for your physical well being, but your mental as well.

For instance...a few reasons why until Mr. Right gets a grip, LA Fitness is better than a man.

The gym won't:
Mistreat you
cheat on you
give you herpes
make it "clap"
work you out less than thirty seconds
call you fat
or, have a secret cyber relaysh behind ya back.

Therefore, as long as you have the sun, a gym, and bathtub. Ladies, ya really have no business settling for less than the best. <3

Protecting Your Heart...or Testing Someone Else's?

When you are burned by individuals in your life, much too frequently...a wall begins to go up. With each flawed relationship the wall gets a little higher...a little tougher. This makes you a little more cautious...a little less trusting. This makes it hard for those with ill intentions to break your heart...BUT, the biggest downfall to the "wall"...is that when someone with a good heart, great intentions, and a look in their eye for you that you KNOW is different than past pursuers...you make it even harder for them to get through to you.

At what point in our minds and our hearts do we let go of the damage our past has caused us, to take a risk on someone different. At what point do you trust that someone isn't out to hurt you, but out to try to give you everything you never knew you really needed.

Do you end things immediately, before a negative outcome could even be a possibility?
Do you string things along, never settling down, even if its good, because you think if it is too good it will be gone?
Do you actually push away, while in the process of slowly opening up to someone?
Do you spend so much time selfishly protecting your heart, that you fail to realize you are breaking someone else's?

The cycle of the past is a vicious one.
We all look to the future and claim our past will stay just there...in the past...yet how often do we make comparisons, snap judgments, assumptions, and mistakes...due to our past experiences...all while knowing we want the same outcome, to fall in love, meaningful, lasting love.

Behind every player, there is a girl that broke his heart, or treated him like garbage.
Behind every "independent" girl, there is a man who convinced her she would never be good enough, and now she only believes she is at her best alone.
Behind every smut, there is a man who destroyed her self-esteem.
Behind every angry man, there is a woman who stole his sensitivity.

When you are the person who is surrounded by the wall...you attract those who won't want you long term, who don't want to get to know the real you, who just want to have fun. These are the individuals who have probably been through their own fair share of shit, and will most likely put you through the hell they've been through without even realizing. At this point your wall makes you numb, and it doesn't even hurt that bad to be in and out of someone's life so quick like that. Because you will not let yourself care...even though...you want someone to care about, and to care about you the way they should. That big ol' wall of yours attracts those who want to chase you for shits and giggles...not for a fairytale ending...and through this...we miss out on those who really do want to be in our lives. We let good people go, who want nothing more than to earn your trust, your affection, your attention, and someday your love.

I was someone with a wall. Almost 9 years of the worst men you can imagine, all mixed in with some of the most amazing guys I have ever met in my entire life. They'd come inconveniently enough when I was shattered...when my wall was the highest...and not only would I let them go, or push them away, I hurt them. Because I'd rather spend my time with those who would never truly love me...meaning they could never really break my heart.

Having no emotions towards any potential relationships is the loneliest life I ever saw for myself...and moving to FL, and filtering all the negative in my life, dropped my guard a little bit. I still meet shitty men, with shitty personalities...but I am now allowing myself to be open to letting the good guys, well, be good. I've moved mountains for the men in my life. I have always been the best girlfriend I could be, and the best friend. I know I deserve that absolute best and that I will make a man so happy, and they will know how lucky they are.

But, what happens when that person is the epitome of "the wall"...
What happens when your guard drops for someone who makes you want to put it right back up because they are so busy "protecting" themselves that they are actually breaking you down day to day?
How long do you wait for someone to trust you, while they aren't earning any trust themselves?
How long do you sit around lonely waiting for them to want to spend time with you, or show you that you are important to them too?
How long do you wait before you realize...that guard is up for good, and they just don't feel the same about you?
When do you decipher the difference between commitment issues and plain ol' mind fucking?

When do you stop feeling like a dumbass hopeless romantic waiting for the green light...and move on to those who will not only appreciate you, but move mountains for you as well.

How many people do you let walk out of your life because you pushed them in that direction...before you let the right one in?

Because I know if I am pushed far enough...I am not coming back.

Bar-back the fuck up.

Douchebag move #2,986

Last night @ the ale house I was at the bar getting a water. The barback walks up asking if I needed a bartender, naturally, I smiled and said "yeah, thank you."

He stares for a hot minute, smiling, while I stare down at my phone hoping the elderly man breathing blue moon in the general direction of my mouth wont talk to me.

Barboy brings over the bartender and goes, "this is my beautiful cousin, take care of her."

Clearly, I let her know this wasn't the truth, he makes a few cute comments, and I walk back to the rest of the group. I go back a little while later, again, barboy, "cousins doesn't really work, we should just get married."...

I laugh, ward off gramps to my left who know is telling me he loves my long nails...and walk away. I catch him tell a co-worker that i'm beautiful, and stares me down.

At this point in the night I was hating men bc a certain realization surfaced...and I just kinda wanted to a) go home and down a bottle of wine and lay naked in my bed. b) go work out or c) punch the closest guy in the throat and say thank you.

I went back to the bar for the final time, and barboy walks up, chatting me up, being really sweet. He tells pop pop next to me he should buy me a drink bc its my bachelorette party...everyone goes really?! He says she's marrying me, and smiled...

That's when the bartender walked up and says....wait for it...waitt for ittttt.


































"Yeah you're fucking girlfriend would love that."..............















































homey turned fire engine fucking red, put his head down and couldn't look at me the rest of the night.
Man, I'd totally love if my bf told women he wanted to marry them all night. SO dreamy <3

One Night Snug.

Are these acceptable in this day and age?

I don't want a boyfriend, because clearly, a good man is hard to find.

I don't want to sleep around, because clearly, aids is easy to find.

I just want to snug.

Dammit.